I consider it to be very important that we give voice to our seasons of unknowing. In the midst of so much uncertainty in the external world, it can be scarier still to sense the same perils within — and yet any transformation involves some terrible precipice, a standing out on the edge, preparing for expansion which by nature stretches us and sends us out beyond our present container (we cannot see what it looks like yet though we start to envision our lives on the other side — imagination thrives first in the abstract.) It seems that once through this Dark Night of the Soul (as St John of the Cross called it) we begin to see our wounds as portals. Teachers. The new “seeing” comes after a necessary fermentation which must be done with a degree of darkness. This poem speaks to that, I think.
My God is A Ghost
I search for you through gritted teeth
Through cloistered forgotten reveries
That once appeared so clear to me
That is what faith demands
A kind of softness when the mind insists force
Hooked by the syndrome of white noise
Did I build a dwelling here without realizing?
My God is a ghost
Closer than the air I breathe
Though the law of Spirit eludes me
How to hold what has no form or speed?
What if it each wound were a bounty
A sacred cross to take up
So that the pain may be reclaimed
by none other than Love?
It’s not an accident, perhaps
That I come back to this place
Time and time again
I sense without a single common sense
That there’s an invitation at play
A call to say yes
To all that screams no
And be led by the shadow of a hand I trust
Now that there’s nowhere else left to go
Upcoming Shows :
If you’re in New York, I am playing 4 shows at the BlueNote next week. It’s very exciting to be playing such an iconic venue and I’m forming an amazing band for it. I’m reimagining songs from the last album “Idols & Vices” but in a more jazz type setting with lots of improvisation in the sections where features would have been coming in on the album! I love the chance to re-think songs in new settings. I can firmly say that these are going to be very special. There are 2 performances each night on March 25th and 26th.
You can buy tickets HERE.
Also! If you’re in Upstate New York, I play Kingston on March 27th (which happens to be my birthday!) and I’d love to see you there.
Tickets for Kingston, NY are HERE.
Yes 🥲 The wound is the portal from where light enters you- paraphrasing Rumi. So you be still- let the darkness and Light do their job ❤️
This is beautiful. Wounds have always been portals for me, I miss New York, and we have the same birthday 😂🖤🐦⬛🌌